I saw an odd thing while there today. A guy was BLASTING the song "Lean Back" by Fat Joe from his radio right beneath an enormous sign that says, "Please Be Respectful: No Loud Music". And the guy who works there walks up to the guy and very politely asks him to turn it down. The guy just shook his head "no". And he did it really casually too. As though someone had asked him if he'd like more coffee or if he swings. As if to say, "No thank you, that request doesn't fit my needs today." I felt so bad for the "guy who asks people to turn down their music when it's too loud" guy. I mean; that's pretty much his only function. It must be hard for him to go home and tell his kids about what I imagine he's referring to as the "Fat Joe: Lean Back" incident. Every time he's out now and hears "Lean Back" he'll immediately get all pissed off. And while all his friends are dancing in the club and yelling over the music, "Hey Juan or Bob or Reggie (no idea what race he was) why aren't you leaning back like the rest of us? It's a really easy dance, all you have to do is lean back. Don't be shy, it's not nearly as complicated as the Macarana, the Humpty dance or the Hora." And he'll go home alone that night cause he was in too bad a mood to spit magic at the ladies and find his kids a step-baby's momma.
Peace, and well hmmm. nah. Okay love too.
I'm directing Scrubs next week. Episode
I also bought a new toothbrush. I'm very loyal to my toothbrushes, so it's always hard for me to make the switch over to a new one. Me and the last one have been through so much together, but alas his time had come. He looked kind of pissed at me in the garbage can. Maybe I'm reading into it, but his bristles had this judgmental frown to them. I swear I heard him mumble something to my contacts. It was faint and admittedly I have a guilty conscience, but I'm pretty sure I heard him say, "It's on tonight... let the floss and the Calamine know, we're gonna take him out in his sleep." But maybe I'm just being paranoid, they were probably just talking about something else entirely.
And now another episode of Rumor Patrol:
Rumor: They're making a Garden State tv show.
Rumor: They're making a Garden State musical.
True. In all honesty, it's the same music and lyrics as Oklahoma, they're just calling it, "Newark!"
Rumor: Clark Kent and I are the same person; he's just me with glasses.
Rumor: I'm dating Bea Arthur.
Rumor: I saved a bus load of children from certain demise when their school bus careened off the road and was teetering on the edge of a bridge.
True. But they weren't children and there was no bridge. I actually just honked at a bus. To be honest it wasn't even a bus, it was a kite. And I didn't honk at it, I yelled at it cause I thought it was following me. It turns out I was just on an outdoor treadmill... in a park... during a kite parade.
Sleep tight, what the hell it's Labor Day - allow the bed bugs to bite.
Ah Labor. We love it so much we gave it it's own day.
While many of you are doing traditional Labor Day activities like attending barbecues, relaxing at the beach and burning animal sacrifices to Zeus, I chose to honor labor by actually doing some hard labor. I've been laying railroad tracks across my neighbor's infinity pool all morning. I had to stop because he started screaming at me for no reason. It might have been because he was awakened at 6am to me singing old caucasian spirituals as I swung hammer to rail.
First and foremost I always hoped people would have a good laugh and hopefully empathize with the characters. But the fact that so many of you are relating to the themes and subject matter is so comforting to me, because for many years when I was feeling all these feelings, I felt incredibly alone; I couldn't find many people who were "in it"... going through the mental puberty that your twenties can be. - (Or any time of your life that involves feeling long overdue for the next chapter of your life to begin.)
When I wrote Garden State, I was completely depressed, waiting tables and lonesome as I've ever been in my life. The script was a way for me to articulate what I was feeling; alone, isolated, "a dime a dozen" and homesick for a place that didn't even exist. I guess one of the cool things about the success of Garden State is that those of you out there who are "in it" and feeling all these things, can take comfort in the fact that there are so many people commenting on this blog (including me) that can relate. And as lonely as you ever feel, you are not alone.